How do you choose a great healer? What’s the difference between a saleperson who claims to heal, and a genuine therapist? This article is dedicated to Francesca, from Francesca’s Flowers, one of my biggest blog supporters, and a fellow 11:11 See’r.
‘When you need help getting back on-board your purpose, the last thing you need is a wave of drama!’ (see cute pic of Charlie)
As a professional psychic, who’s spent over $40K on treatments, products and programs since 2014 alone, you think I’d know the answer. Well – you’d be right – sortof. I may be psychic, but I’m also painfully logical (spot the ex-scientist), sceptical and empathic. It’s a strange mix, which means I tend to doubt myself (and others) until I have proof of their integrity.
I began using alternative therapies at 14, when our drama teacher taught us meditation (what a blessing!) At 18, I learned hypnosis to relieve panic attacks during exams. Soon afterwards, I had massage for a frozen shoulder, which was so painful I cried during the first few sessions. However, it wasn’t until I was 23, and had counselling after the tsunami, that I dove into self-healing (for a list of what I’ve tried, see the end of this post).
In most cases, I had positive experiences, but in others, I asked for refunds or made complaints. As a Master 11 lifepath, who’s here to trigger massive change, I have high expectations. See my post on weird refunds I’ve made. That’s why I did thousands of readings to believe in myself, and why I don’t recommend healers until I’ve seen them many times (and analysed their numerology and palmistry).
So, based on experience, here are my Suggestions for Choosing a Great Healer
Tip: In numerology, every word has a vibration (see the system I use). HEALER adds to 31/4, the same as words like FATHER, DESIGN, GARDEN, SCIENCE and GREEN. The 3 energy is about reclaiming your willpower (Solar Plexus/ 3rd Chakra), the 1 energy about new beginnings (Root/ 1st Chakra), and 4 energy is about transforming pain into understanding (Heart/ 4th Chakra). It’s interesting that the colour for heart healing is green, as many healers connect to nature in order to help their clients reconnect with their lifepath and original mission. Ethical healers don’t give us energy, so much as remind us that we ARE energy, seeking reunion with itself (see books like a Course in Miracles or Esther and Jerry Hicks’ work for more on these concepts).
Before you start – check someone’s website, social media and/ or testimonials before you book in with them. Even better, call them first or watch videos – you can tell a lot from someone’s voice and body language. I value experience over qualifications or years in practice, because as Tony Robbins says, ‘execution trumps knowledge’. I’ve done full-time psychic readings for years (averaging 300-400 clients p.a.), specialising in Master Number 11/22/33’s. So I may be faster and more accurate, than someone who hasn’t specialised in this way.
Questions to ask yourself:
-What do I need help with, first? (To be human is to have aches and pains – you need to prioritise)
-Have I looked into the spiritual meaning of this issue? (See this post)
-How committed am I to getting a result? (Sometimes you’ll need to see more than one therapist at a time)
-Do I have time to go through a healing crisis? (When it comes to alternative therapies, you may feel worse before you feel better, so book treatments when you have time to rest – this is in contrast to some Western medicine, which tends to focus on quick fixes)
-How will I know if the treatment has worked? (If you don’t know where you’re going, any route will take you there…)
-What would I pay to shift this block? (In my life, even one day off work is worth hundreds of $, in lost income and/ or frustration)
-Who else has solved this problem? (They may be able to refer you to their healers)
Questions to ask your potential healer (or research on their site):
-What do you like about your work? (If they can’t answer this, run away quickly – they’re probably in burnout)
-How did you get started? (I admire people who’ve had to overcome struggles, like family conservatism)
-Where did you study? (Some qualifications are reassuring – you could also look for membership of organisations like IICT etc.)
-Who are your main clients? (If they don’t sound like you, proceed with caution)
-How many times do your clients tend to come back? (I like people who are willing to ‘fire’ me once I’m better)
-Why do you price your sessions this way? (look for someone who’s upfront about fees, and raises them every so often – that’s just logical, based on inflation and the fact they should be up-skilling/ improving themselves professionally)
-Who treats you? (I’m a fan of healers with support networks and work/ life balance- otherwise they might pass their fatigue to me)
-Treat you as a Soul first, and client second. They look you in the eyes when talking to you. They ask you how you are, and care about the reply. They take your concerns seriously. They see you as a whole and perfect being who wants to grow, not a collection of diseases and/ or traumas. Most of all, they emphasise your vast inner power – your body’s capacity for recovery, your mind’s capacity for learning, and your Soul’s infinite journey. They see treating you as an honour, not a chore or opportunity to feel superior.
–Don’t oversell. If someone tries to sell me something, within 15 minutes of meeting them, I’m on guard. There has to be give and take. As a client, I’ve paid someone to work with/ on me. This should be their priority until we establish rapport. As author John Maxwell says, ‘people don’t care how much you know, until they know how much you care’. That said – if you’re at an expo, or having a discounted/ free consultation, your healer has a right to ask you for a sale. It’s just good manners and karma – they have bills to pay too.
I’m cool with healers asking for referrals, but not every time they contact me. They should respect my No, and have momentum on their own. Exceptions to this rule would be healers who are starting out, or who are returning to work after a break. Think of a restaurant – the food and/ or service should be enough to bring you back, without relying on constant discounts. It’s the same with a orchard – if you harvest gently, and look after what you have, you won’t need to keep replanting trees every year. Perhaps this dislike of strong sales tactics is an Australian vs American culture clash, or a hangover from when I used to attend pushy church and personal growth courses.
–Work on themselves, and also know when to stop. I don’t mind if my healers get sick, but I do question them if they get stuck. For example, my acupuncturist commented that his back was playing up. When I asked how he was going to treat it, he said he was going to see a friend soon. Next time I booked in, he was much better. That’s good for him, and for me as a client. I pickup on energies and if my healer is unwell, not only do I sometimes mimic their symptoms, I don’t feel good receiving from them. I also love healers who take holidays, who are happy to ‘fire themselves’ when I get well, and who have a life (family/ hobbies/ partner) outside their practice. That’s the kind of balance I aspire to as well. When you choose people who have the results you want, you tend to zoom up the ladder.
–Bully or guilt you into seeing them again. I love getting treatments, and am super loyal to healers I like. For example, I’ve seen Steve Katz at the Infinite Potential Centre, Jolene at Clayfield Chiropractic, Vicki Haspels, Deniz Akan at Dimensional Healing and Michael Brown at Remedy Lane Chinese Medicine dozens of times. However I return out of free will, not codependence. To me, that’s the opposite of self-care. When I override my intuition, I place myself back on the road to illness. So – ask me once or twice if I want to return, but don’t bombard me with emails, SMS etc. Doesn’t work for me. Maybe I’m just old-fashioned, but I like my privacy respected.
–Treat you like a naughty child or worse, like you’re dirty clothes that need a wash. I remember a healing which went haywire. After a relaxing session, the therapist said, ‘part of your Soul is hanging outside your body, you need a Soul Retrieval!!’ She also yelled at me when I touched an Aura-Soma bottle. While I understand why she did these things (essence bottles pick up energy), the way she scolded me was so cold. It was like the time a psychic said, ‘remind me never to read for you again’ after I mentioned that I had been clearing energies from clients. I felt like toxic waste after that discussion.
In my books, yes, you can pick up vibes from people (especially if you have Silk Skin in palmistry), but you can also remove them through simple techniques, like visualisation, smudging, crystal and flower essences. That said, constantly cleansing yourself can become an addiction. It feeds your ego’s belief that you are a victim. Instead of trying to defend your goalposts all the time (and living reactively), why not raise your energy levels and attitude, so your vibration is too high for people to bring down?
I used to cut cords all day long, but now I do it once after a reading, and then before sleep. I also visualise a fiery white bubble (aura) around me often, as a protective mechanism. And when I argue with someone, instead of trying to block them out, I ask Spirit ‘please, show me the lesson, so I can integrate it and move on’. Who becomes stronger, the person who throws out every chipped brick, or the artist who turns them into a house? Surely the latter…
-Are clockwatchers. If someone keeps checking their watch, phone or clock while they’re supposed to be helping you, they’re not really present. You have the right to ask them to concentrate, but if they don’t – maybe quit while you’re ahead!
-Take the credit for other people’s work, including yours. No one really heals you – they simply remind you that you are powerful and loved, through their words, actions and intention. They help you believe in your infinity again. From that state, miracles begin to be possible.
Having given birth to Charlie a month ago, it irks me when people say ‘my doctor delivered the baby’. It’s not true – the mother delivered the baby. And/ or the baby delivered itself. If a doctor or midwife was present, they assisted, but they didn’t do 99% of the hard work. Similarly, if you experience a shift while seeing a healer, give yourself a hug or pat on the back. It takes courage to reach out, and teamwork to get well. Beware of healers who say, ‘I fixed you’, or constantly fish for compliments e.g. ‘Am I doing ok?’ At some point, you’ll outgrow them, as they’re stuck in the paradigm of ‘I need your approval’. This can take away from your enjoyment and energy levels. A hungry person tends to eat all your icecream, if you get my drift.
I’m also sensitive to people who plagiarise from books and other teachers. I’m upfront about where my lifepath numerology ideas come from (both experience, and books like The Life You Were Born to Live – see my psychic reading for Dan Millman). I credit my psychic teachers openly, because without them, I might still be an unhappy bureaucrat in Canberra. I expect the same from my healers.
-Are a mixture of the qualities I’ve mentioned above. They might deliver a great massage, but complain about their girlfriend, to the point you feel they should pay you for counselling. They might be a powerful teacher, but keep asking you to buy their products, even after you’ve said No several times. Or perhaps, they’re inconsistent or rude – one time you feel like their $50 treatment was worth $500 in enhanced wellbeing, but next time you feel drained or rushed in and out of their office.
What can you do in these cases? Firstly, stay open-minded. Everything is a potential lesson. Did you go into the session with mixed expectations? Are you being pushed around in other areas of life? It’s vital to own your attitude before you give someone feedback on their work. Words can’t be withdrawn. Remember, it’s unrealistic to hold your healer (partner/ child or anyone else, really!) to higher standards that you model yourself. If you sit with the experience, and still feel incomplete, then I recommend talking to your healer asap.
Using the sandwich technique can help – this is where you pass on a mixture of positive and constructive feedback, e.g.
‘My back feels much better each time I see you, and I’m so glad I found your clinic. However, sometimes when you joke that I’m a couch potato or lazy, I feel judged and it affects my confidence. I need you to stop using those terms around me, so I can feel more relaxed in our sessions. Thanks for understanding.’
Most practitioners would be happy to oblige a request like this. They’d also be relieved you let them know about the issue, before it turned into something more serious. Never feel embarrassed to admit your truth. Perhaps the Universe is using you as a messenger to help your healer. This is often the case with people carrying Master 11/22/33/44 numerology (find your lifepath). I recall one woman who came up to me after a talk, where I said ‘just because you have Master Numbers doesn’t mean you never get sick – you often need twice the help!’ She was a Master 33/6 from memory, and her medical doctor had begun a research study on a particular herb, because of her. She opened his mind, and this benefitted all the patients who came after her.
Sometimes part of our healing comes from standing up to authority figures (even healers) and saying ‘that didn’t work for me’, or ‘I’ve had enough – I don’t need you anymore’. I see this a lot in people who have gut (courage/ personal power) and/ or throat (inner voice) disorders e.g. thyroid problems – see this post on healing a stiff neck. Our immune system and Heart (4th) Chakra/ Thymus Gland are linked in energy medicine, so illness can also be a sign we don’t feel safe in a human body – more rest and spiritual/ sacred time is recommended.
I hope this article helps you to identify healers, who come from a place of love and integrity. I use the term ‘bad healer’ loosely – in the end, everyone has their talents, it’s just that we don’t always resonate with their frequency at the time. It’s like an oboe player trying to teach a violinist how to play. When you’re in a state of vulnerability, you need someone who understands your body/ instrument, not who’s guessing at what’s wrong.
FYI, the alternative therapies I’ve studied and/ or tried include: Australian Bush Flower Essences, Acupuncture, Art Therapy, Craniosacral therapy, Chiropractic, Crystal Healing, EFT (Tapping) and Dissolution and Freedom Technique, Family Constellations, Hand Analysis, Holistic Counselling, Kinesiology, Life Coaching, Massage, Mediumship, Money Love Coaching, Past Life Regression, Reflexology, Reiki, Sound Healing, Tribe of the Tree Essences, Yoga (also pre- and post-natal yoga). I also have an amazing Personal Trainer in Brisbane, called Naomi Berg from Purple Skirt. You name it, I’ll know someone who does it in Brisbane…if you ever need a referral, check out the links above or just email me and I’ll ask around.
Wishing you a powerful future, full of abundant health, Spirit Signs you can trust, and healers who live up to the hype.
7 Signs of Spiritual Whitewashing – How to Avoid New Age Silliness
8 Signs of a Good Doctor – They Always Have Patience!
The Spiritual Meaning of Common Diseases
Mercury Retrograde 2017 – Even High Flyers Need a Safety Net
October 5 at 6:43am Patti Barton Thanks Sarah for your thorough, thoughtful and well written article for evaluating healers. Objectively self-examining my own healing work I’d tick most of your boxes but not all. So you have given me pause for thought, thank you. 🖐🏿😊
October 5 at 6:59am Sarah Yip You’re very conscious Patti, that’s 99% of the healing 🙂 xxOctober 5 at 7:51am
Jayne Tancred Sarah, this is one of the most beautifully expressed discussions on this topic that I’ve read in ages – thank you for all you do helping people to connect with and claim their power and personal growth, and thanks for the shout out for Tribe of the Tree flower essences too xxx (PS: Charlie is so cute! How do you do anything but stare at him all day and cuddle him endlessly???)October 5 at 7:56am
Norelle Hentschel This is awesome, Sarah. I feel inspired to be a better healer just by reading this. I will be saving this to refer back to. Especially loved: “No one really heals you – they simply remind you that you are powerful and loved, through their words, actions and intention. They help you believe in your infinity again.” A similar thing was said to me by a teacher many years ago and I always remind myself of this before a consultation so I remove my own ego and it’s all about them.
October 5 at 8:16am Steve Katz Thank you Sarah. You are Awesome. The only person that can heal you is you. You heal. A self proclaimed healer is someone who takes ones power away and puts your healing in their hands. In the area of growth and development this is not helping the person to feel empowered. Isn’t that what is really the goal, Empowerment and Growth? When a healer heals someone else, this leaves the person being healed beholding to someone else for their health and well being. I for one am a Healing Facilitator, I help make it easier for a person to heal themselves. That is truthfully all one can do for people to help them be the best they can be. Much Love to you all and thank you again Sarah for being an incredible Healing Facilitator. PS Charlie is gorgeous. Such a light in the Multiverse.